The Icebreak Report

Each week The Icebreak Report covers something a little different- from bedrooms to ballots. This week, while looking for topics to investigate, it became clear that the Kristen Stewart/Robert Pattinson drama was still dominating the wires, as everything from cafe behavior to the couple’s sleeping arrangements for their upcoming worldwide promo tour for “Breaking Dawn: Part 2” were analyzed as a relationship barometer. Even Donald Trump weighed in on their relationship.

For anyone living under proverbial rock, the couple recently reconciled after Stewart was caught by paparazzi getting cuddly with her former director, resulting in a real-life breakup devastating to Twihards.  So on the topic of cheating and getting caught, we surveyed our users to find out, “If your friend was being cheated on, would you tell them?”

Overall percentages across the board were surprisingly consistent, with almost three quarters of respondents saying that they would definitely tell a friend if they were being cheated on. For those who said “it depends,” they cited closeness with both the friend and their partner, and the circumstances of the affair. An equally small percentage of men versus women (5%) said that they would confront the cheater and give them a chance to confess first. 

I would give the cheater an earful, give him/her a chance to come forward, if they don’t, then I’ll step in.

When broken down by age, a few groups stood out amongst the rest.

• Most likely to tell a friend? Men 18-24yrs (83%)
• Most likely to keep quiet about an affair? Women 33-40 yrs (15.6%)
• Most likely to consider the circumstances before telling friend? Men 33-40 (30.4%)
• Most likely to confront the cheater? Men 33-40yrs (8.7%)

Percentages based on relationship status were still overwhelmingly in support of telling a friend about their cheating partner. However, those who were married were far less likely to get involved than those in dating relationships.

• 9.6% of married women versus 6.3% of dating women would not tell their friend
• 7.4% of married men versus 1.5% of dating men would not tell their friend

Hard to say. I don’t like people in my relationship, & I sure as hell wouldn’t want to hear it from a friend. The truth always comes out no matter what. So no. It’s not my secret to tell. 

i did this once and [got] in trouble, she suffered a lot, the guy hated me forever, they got back and she doesn’t speak to me anymore :/

i would definitely tell them, but only after giving the cheater a chance to confess themselves.  if the cheater doesn’t confess, then i would let my friend know in the most delicate manner possible.  my wife, however; strongly disagrees and thinks one should just stay out of the whole thing.  she’s concerned about the messenger getting shot (e.g. why disrupt ignorant bliss to bring misery).

For more ways to share perspectives with your partner, and for insight into a community of couples, check out theicebreak.com. Or, you can get our app to start connecting with your partner in a whole new way.